Hasta La Creative!

I was enjoying Telemundo the other day when Danny Trejo interrupted a trio of cellphone-using friends to save Miller Time.

I don't speak Spanish, but you don't need to in order to appreciate the presence of Trejo. Casanova Pendrill made an excellent choice by casting the toughest of toughs. Without nothing more than a stone cold stare, he castigates the inconsiderate friends who are paying more attention to their technology than to sacred beer time. He inclines his head slightly, his heavy-lidded eyes drifting downward in an unspoken threat. Drop the phones, his face says, before you disappoint me. All three quickly dunk their phones in the Miller Lite ice bucket. Trejo lets a smile flit across his face before turning, his hair whipping back in an unseen wind, presumably running off to protect Miller Time elsewhere.

From New Belgium's app that shuts down your phone when you're drinking to the Offline Glass, which stands up straight only if it's resting on your cellphone, bars and beer companies are taking a stand against social media's social-killing effect. Of course, none of them stand quite as tall as Trejo.

Concerned that technology is keeping us all apart, Milka chocolate created a unique vending experience this summer that made Argentine strangers work together to score free sweets. Local agency David placed a cow statue across from a vending machine and challenged people to connect the two by holding hands in order to get free chocolate bars. Each time they cashed in, the cow moved farther away, requiring more people to hold hands until they spanned across the public square. The resulting video, with more than 1 million views, is another example of how one smart idea on a small scale can quickly go global. Considered alongside Milka's current "Dare to be tender" campaign in France, where missing squares of the chocolate can be paid forward to loved ones, it’s not all that shocking that a comfort food would latch onto the comforting notion of bringing people together. Of course, it's togetherness fueled by a good old-fashioned bribe. 

Vinny Guadagnino of Jersey Shore stars as a well-endowed yoga hunk in this decidedly unique Benefit Cosmetics spot for They're Real! mascara. The ad opens to hunky dude ogling, which is oh so trendy right now. But it wastes no time focusing right on their man candy, as all the ladies around them become visibly excited. Then the men reach into their pants and pull out … a handful of mascara tubes to toss to the women—delivering the message that their bulges might be fake but your lashes could be nice. Or perhaps the message is the tagline: "Laughter is the best cosmetic."

The agency, Portal A, also roped in actor Simon Rex (aka Dirt Nasty) and Vine-famous comedian Brittany Furlan to round out the cameos. Benefit is doing exactly the right kind of things to draw attention to its tiny, feisty brand, but the spot doesn't go quite far enough to be funny or outrageous. Vinny, in particular, comes off as inexplicably suave as he winks in tree pose. Maybe they should have just let Brittany make five six-second Vines and call it a day. Her Vines about the spot are hilars.

Saturday Night Live alumnus Bill Hader has teamed up with T-Mobile to become the brand's first spokesperson in several years not to wear a bright pink dress. The spots, directed by Adam & Dave of Arts & Sciences, advertise a new program called Jump, which does away with the crazy multi-year wait times for phone upgrades—a $10-a-month fee lets you upgrade twice a year. The spots, created by Publicis, show Hader in unfortunate but familiar situations like dropping his phone in a urinal, trying to dry it out in some rice, getting one-upped by someone with a better phone, having it squished by a large mustachioed man, and getting stuck with a phone that won't hold a charge. Hader is funny, but even funnier is Brian Huskey of Swagger Wagon and Sonic commercial fame, who delivers his usual awkward deadpan brilliance.

Gillette has a super-geeky Man of Steel tie-in and YouTube takeover going on right now, where they ask an impressive list of celebrities, "How does Superman shave?" Bill Nye, the science guy, offers a theory based in materials science. Super-geek movie director Kevin Smith suggests he uses a piece of the spaceship he came to Earth in (while detailing and dismissing some super other amusing theories, including the one from the comics that he uses his heat-vision reflected in a mirror to burn each hair off). The Big Bang Theory's Mayim Bialik (whom you may know as Blossom, and who also has a real Ph.D in neuroscience) puts forth that Superman has super-Nair. Finally, the MythBusters guys give five or six theories before landing on the Large Hadron Collider. Surprisingly, but not in a bad way, no one said with a Gillette razor. It's a smart idea and a great tie-in. Ad agency Concept One came up with the notion for Gillette. If you want to hash over your own theory, tweet at #HowDoesHeShave. Or just search it to geek out on the crazy pseudo-science theories. Asking comic-book nerds to argue an absurd bit of superhero minutiae on social media? Their evil plan just might work! More spots below.

Lego has unveiled a life-size Star Wars X-Wing fighter jet made entirely of Legos in Times Square. It promotes an upcoming Cartoon Network show called The Yoda Chronicles. You can also see a life-size Lego Chewy, Vader, R2-D2, C-3PO and Boba Fett in the promo for the show. But the X-Wing has the distinction of being the largest Lego structure built to date. At 11 feet tall, 43 feet long, 44 feet wide and almost 46,000 pounds, it's made of 5,335,200 individual Lego bricks. It took 32 people four months just to put it together. And you can climb into the cockpit for a photo. Which means all you Star Wars and Lego fans must make a pilgrimage to this, the largest and most awesome Lego thing ever made, and get a picture of your child sitting in the cockpit shouting "Pew! Pew!" See lots more photos at Gizmodo.

Gil Zamora is an FBI-trained forensics artist with over 3,000 criminal sketches under his belt. Dove (through Unilever's U.K. office) and Ogilvy Brazil hired him to interview and draw seven different women—two sketches of each. The first sketch was based on each woman's personal description of herself. The second was based on a description provided by a stranger the woman had just met. Of course, the differences are vast. Watching these women come face to face with the version of themselves in their mind and the version everyone else sees is extraordinary. It's one of the most original and touching experiments to come from the Campaign for Real Beauty in ages, because instead of making faux protests or annoying graphic designers with bullshit filters, they're actually empowering individual women to appreciate their inherent beauty, and in turn, allowing us all to wonder if we've been judging ourselves too harshly. Like all of the best work, the commercial elements are barely there. Beyond the logo, Dove doesn't even attempt to sell soap. Watch the documentary below, and mini-videos of selected women on the web site. Then enjoy the rousing comments section, where people are already attacking Dove for choosing too many skinny, white chicks.

CREDITS
Client: Dove
Agency: Ogilvy & Mather Brazil
Chief Creative Officer: Anselmo Ramos
Executive Creative Director: Roberto Fernandez /Paco Conde
AD: Diego Machado
CW: Hugo Veiga
Sketch Artist: Gil Zamora
Producer: Veronica Beach
Junior Producer: Renata Neumann
Business Manager: Libby Fine
CEO: Luis Fernando Musa
Group Account Director: Valeria Barone
Account Director: Ricardo Honegger

Production Company: Paranoid US
Director: John X Carey
Executive Producer: Jamie Miller / Claude Letessier
Line Producer: Stan Sawicki
Director of Photography: Ed David

—Long Version
Executive Producer: Jamie Miller / Claude Letessier
Producer: Stan Sawicki
Editor: Phillip Owens
Music: Subtractive
Sound mix: Lime Studio
Composer: Keith Kenniff
Mixer: Sam Casas
Executive Producer: Jessica Locke
Production Sound: Tim O’Malley
Color Grading: Company 3
Colorist: Sean Coleman

—Short Version and Cinema
Editorial Company: Rock Paper Scissor
Executive Producer: Carol Lynn Weaver
Editor: Paul Kumpata
Assistant Editor: Niles Howard
Online: A52
Executive Producer: Megan Meloth
Producer: Jamie McBriety
Music: Subtractive
Composer: Keith Kenniff
Sound mix: Lime Studio
Mixer: Sam Casas
Executive Producer: Jessica Locke
Production Sound: Tim O’Malley
Color Grading: Company 3
Colorist: Sean Coleman

If you've been under a rock, violence against women in India has been all over the news since last December following the horrific gang rape of a young woman who had the audacity to take a bus. She died from her injuries, sparking protests across India. So now when I tell you Ford has had to apologize for ads created by JWT India that depict women tied up in the back of a Ford Figo, you won't be quite so surprised. The ads never ran, but were picked up when the Internet, always on the lookout for something to be offended about, found them on Ads of the World. In one illustration, Paris Hilton has tied up the Kardashians and stuck them in her boot. In another, Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi has roped himself three scantily clad women. The tagline: "Leave your worries behind with Figo's extra-large boot." For those who say some people are just too sensitive to hilarious cartoon violence against women, let me explain a few things: 1) It's not less violent because it's a cartoon. 2) It's not less violent if the violence is perpetrated by another woman. 3) It's about time people got upset over casual violence toward women, which is all over the place. The sad thing is that it has to be triggered by extreme events for people to notice what's been there all along. 4) Yes, there are ads that show violence against men (though they're a lot fewer). No, people are not saying violence against men is acceptable in ads just because they're saying violence against women is unacceptable. 5) Yes, it's obviously intended as a joke. But jokes exist in context, and right now, it's really, really, superbly unfunny. It's just too bad for Ford that the brand will suffer for ads it didn't even approve. It's a good reminder that the Internet doesn't know the difference.

Doritos has built a 62-foot-tall, tweet-powered concert stage designed to look like a giant vending machine that turns your tweets with the hashtag #BoldStage into a real-time concert-control mechanism at SXSW. Confused as to how? They've made a handy infographic (below) to 'splain. You can not only use your furious tweeting power to choose the opening act at the Doritos gig, you get to choose their playlist, and then, just to mess with them, you control the special effects. That's right—smoke, balloons, pyrotechnics and fricking lasers are all in your hashtagged hands. So, of course, you can also send pictures of yourself having a freaking awesome time directly to the four-story-tall screen in the arena! There's a 9.6-second lag, presumably to make sure you don't tweet your beets. LL Cool J, Public Enemy, Ice Cube and Doug E. Fresh will be sharing the stage with Doritos' awesomely awesome creation of pure LED force. Listen to a low-energy LL ramble about it in the video below. But who really cares about the has-beens on the stage when they'll also be premiering new ads that launch the first Doritos global campaign titled "For the Bold" that will completely change the brand's look and feel?