On the receptionists desk was a webcamera, and it reacted to movement, so they captured their guests on film.
It only took 130 seconds to carry out eleven portable G3’s. The cops did arrived with guns drawn, but alas, too late.
After an enthusiastic bit of protesting, Norway is going to have to wait a bit longer for the eagerly anticipated McMeerkat Happy Meal. It appears that it is now politically incorrect to use African recipes. Does this mean that we’ll now have to close Chinese restaurants because China violates human rights?
http://homepage.mac.com/johnpatroulis/iMovieTheater3.html
Acme Idea co states: “Most consumers don’t have an emotional connection to their batteries, and with this campaign we hope to change that.”
You know why we don’t have an emotional connection to our batteries – we have to throw them away when we’re done*.
*or recycle.
“…Along with the new ads, DURACELL has changed the chemical composition of its COPPERTOP and ULTRA batteries. The new makeup will allow the batteries to last longer, Davin said.” .. Notice how he had to kick that old proposition in there at the end, just to be safe.
“What’s an agency suit?”, the guy thinks to himself. “What the heck, I’ve never tried a magic lamp before. I’ll just go ahead anyway.”
So he opens the box, takes out the lamp and rubs it Aladdin-style and
Shazaam! he’s face to face with a genie.
“At your service, master. But wait a minute. You don’t look like an account guy. Didn’t you read the label?”
The guy is a little surprised, but decides to take a chance. “Oh, but I am. I’m a suit.”
The genie is suspicious, but since he can’t really prove the opposite: “Hm. Alright then. Here’s the deal. You get to make three wishes, I grant them, and you put the lamp back in the box. OK?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“OK then, but remember you only have three wishes. So you’d better be sure before you make a wish. Now bring ’em on!”
“I want a million dollars. A Cadillac convertible filled with bikini blondes. And a really big house.”
There’s a few moments of silence. Then the genie looks at the guy, and asks:
“Are you done?”
“Yeah. You said three wishes, right?”
The genie smiles. “OK dude, now I know you’re not an account guy.”
“How?”
“Well, despite the fact that I said three wishes, a real suit wouldn’t stop until eight or nine”
Anyway, so the cinematographer is waiting and waiting as the line slowly inches forward, but he’s not all that tweaked out, since, hey! he’s going to heaven.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, a black mercedes S600 V12 comes screeching to a fishtailing halt right outside the gates, the door opens and a pompous ass in all black clothing (and sunglasses to match) pops out.
He slams the door, strides confidently to the front of the line, tosses the car keys to Saint Peter (who barely catches them) and turns around to look at the line. He pulls down his sunglasses and stands there.
“Great… Really great… Keep it up!” he says patting Saint Peter on the back before turning on his heel and whizzing right through the gates before anyone can say (or even think) a word.
This is finally too much for our cinematographer friend, who, despite the risk of eternal damnation, loses his cool and runs screaming at Saint Peter.
“Great!” says the cinematographer, “I bust my ass my whole life… working on sets, making the film look great, taking all the crap from the idiot clients and the spineless director and finally I’m dead, and I had a good life… was a good man, and I get here to the pearly gates and I’m waiting and waiting with everybody else.. following the rules… And why? For what?”
“It’s just the same up here. The asshole director shows up at the last minute, doesn’t stand in line and goes flying through the pearly gates without so much as a word from you, and no body even stops him or tells him to stand in line with the rest of us… This is a load of shit!”
Saint Peter, shrugs with an embarrassed smile and explains… “Oh no… I’m sorry… you don’t understand… that’s not a director… that’s God. He just thinks he’s a director.”
An advert for Ann Summers chain of sex/lingerie shops, depicting the Queen reading a sex manual next to the line “Phwoar, must get one”, has provoked a rare letter of complaint from Buckingham Palace.
“There is a widely held convention that reputable companies do not use photographs of members of the royal family for promotional purposes.”
However, there are no actual legal restrictions on using photographs of the Queen, Ann Summers – an unreputable company? – will keep the campaign up as planned.
Media Guardian has more.
“Business Finance” contributing editor Dan Danbom interviewed Lingua in his New York City office.
Read more for the interview.
Danbom: Is being a cliché expert a full-time job?
Lingua: Bottom line is I have a full plate 24/7.
D. Is it hard to keep up with the seemingly endless supply of clichés that spew from business?
L. Some days, I don’t have the bandwidth. It’s like drinking from a fire hydrant.
D. So it’s difficult?
L. Harder than nailing Jell-O to the wall.
D. Where do most clichés come from?
L. Stakeholders push the envelope until it’s outside the box.
D. How do you track them once they’ve been coined?
L. It’s like herding cats.
D. Can you predict whether a phrase is going to become a cliché?
L. Yes. I skate to where the puck’s going to be. Because if you aren’t the lead dog, you’re not providing a customer-centric proactive solution.
D. Give us a new buzzword that we’ll be hearing ad nauseam.
L. “Enronitis” could be a next-generation player.
D. Do people understand your role as a cliché expert?
L. No, they can’t get their arms around that. But they aren’t incented to.
D. How do people know you’re a cliché expert?
L. I walk the walk and talk the talk.
D. Did incomprehensibility come naturally to you?
L. I wasn’t wired that way, but it became mission-critical as I strategically focused on my go-forward plan.
D. What did you do to develop this talent?
L. It’s not rocket science. It’s not brain surgery. When you drill down to the granular level, it’s just basic blocking and tackling.
D. How do you know if you’re successful in your work?
L. At the end of the day, it’s all about robust, world-class language solutions.
D. How do you stay ahead of others in the buzzword industry?
L. Net-net, my value proposition is based on maximizing synergies and being first to market with a leveraged, value-added deliverable. That’s the opportunity space on a level playing field.
D. Does everyone in business eventually devolve into the sort of mindless drivel you spout?
L. If you walk like a duck and talk like a duck, you’re a duck. They all drink the Kool-Aid.
**************
Oh boy, Claymore our real adland hero, he has collected all the shiny mp3’s from the Bud Light radio campaigns:
“Instead of the archive’s previous 21, we now have 27 Bud Light Real American Hero radio ads. But it doesn’t stop there. In addition, we now have 13 Bud Light Real Men of Genius radio ads, 2 Budweiser UK Real American Hero radio ads that supposedly never aired in the US (if I remember correctly, Brits don’t much care for light beer, so Anheuser Busch obliged and customized),
and the coup de grace… 3 Bud Light radio ads starring Charlton Heston that aired prior to the Real American Heroes campaign.”
Below is the names for the playlist… enjoy!
Looking to topple IPG, WPP, Omnicom and Publicis? Who isn’t! Learn the tricks of the trade from Hoffman York, one agency that fought for their independence from Saatchi and Saatchi and won.
Tom Jordan, Hoffman York’s creative director and author of recently published ‘What’s a Saatchi and How Come We Have Two of Them?’ dropped by adland to share some pearls of wisdom with you adgrunts.
Click continue to read about Hoffman York and Tom Jordan, the Master of Marketing in the Mid-West!
Tom, Before we plug your book, let’s plug your agency. Please tell the good folks at adland a little bit about yourself and your agency ‘ Hoffman York.
We’re about $90 million in billing…75 people…and we try to be more
than just an advertising agency. We pride ourselves on solving problems, overcoming obstacles and maximizing opportunities for our clients. The solution isn’t always advertising.
For example, for Quaker State Motor Oil we created a clear package for
their synthetic oil, offered “Micro Q’filtration which was the clearest, cleanest oil you could buy.” This idea alone helped propel the brand. Sales sky rocketed…without a ton of media advertising.
We try to operate with a collective ego and put the product, not the people, on a pedestal.
It’s our mission to be the place everyone wants to work.
We’ve won quite a few creative awards.
We’ve assembled a very talented, very fun, group of people.
Me? I’m the coach. But a player coach. I think anyone who has “creative” in their title better be creating. So I contribute whenever I can.
Your agency is notorious for running prank ads on April Fool’s Day.
Do you have a personal favorite?
My favorite is the five-wheel drive car we created for our first April Fool’s prank. Coming from Argentina, the Caballo was the only car to offer suspension for the steering wheel from the main frame to offer “clarity of command”. It seems that every auto manufacturer was rushing into R&D to find out what the hell was going on.
Hoffman York was named one of Ad Age’s Top 20 “Creative Agencies to
Watch” in 2001. Did this accolade inflate the egos of your Creative department?
Not at all. We realize that all positive notoriety is short lived.
Tom, your agency merged with Tom Reilly Advertising in May of this
year. How’s that working out for you?
We won the first piece of business we pitched together… the largest health care network in Chicago. We beat 15 other agencies. We’re being included in a lot of new business pitches.
Tom Reilly and I worked together years ago at Burnett. He is one of the most gifted strategically minded creative people I have ever met. This will be a lot of fun.
You started in the business in Chicago at Leo Burnett and Tatham, Laird & Kudner. Will this merger allow you to return to your creative roots?
I never really left my creative roots, but this will provide me an added opportunity to work more with good friends in Chicago.
The title of your new book “What’s a Saatchi and How Come We Have Two of Them?” is based on the fact that Hoffman York was the first agency to successfully buy its freedom from Saatchi and Saatchi in 1984. Now, do you have any advice for Saatchi and Saatchi to buy their freedom from Publicis?
Do they want freedom? I wonder. Freedom comes with risk. That’s why the
book I wrote is about survival.
Your book is chock full of anecdotes from Hoffman York. Besides offering excellent advice to small and medium size shops, do you also dish out dirt on your clients and co-workers?
No, that’s not really our style.
In addition to showcasing your agency’s work, “What’s a Saatchi…” is also a survival guide for small independent shops. Why share your hard earned knowledge with your competitors?
I was a pole vaulter in high school. In fact, I even set the school
record. I showed a lot of people exactly how to do it. Few could.
At least 90% of all advertising is terrible. Who’s to blame?
I disagree. That’s like saying 90% of all children are ugly.
Unless we completely understand the objectives of the advertiser, it’s hard to say what’s good or bad. A lot of award-winning campaigns haven’t been successful in selling product.
I think we have to remember the real business we’re in…helping people
sell stuff. It’s not about us. Even though we are deeply involved in the work…it’s not ours…it’s theirs.
The Wall Street Journal recently reported that marketers are losing confidence in “brand building” advertising and are more interested in direct marketing. Do you favor one over the other?
Horses for courses. It depends on what will have the most impact. We focus more on “business building” than just “brand building”. Clients tend to want to sell something. We always take an open-minded view of each client’s needs. Whatever will work the best…that’s the course we pursue.
Tom, it has been a pleasure. Keep up the good work. Thanks for your time and good luck to you and your book!
Written by a range of organisations, from Orange and VH1 to the NSPCC and the Wales tourist board, they present commercial and social communication challenges and offer the opportunity to demonstrate creativity across a range of media.
The deadline for submitting work is March 21st 2003.
YC’N exists to inspire, support and demonstrate emerging creative thought. These 14 briefs are a live project to do so. Each of the briefs runs alongside a creative agency who will aid in the assesment of creative output and award creative placements to the teams and individuals that produce outstanding work. Each of the briefs also has an award pool of £1500 associated with it. There is no cost associated with submitting work. The creative placements are largely at London agencies but we invite submissions internationally.
http://www.ycn.org.uk
This is site is run by Sascha Endlicher, M.A., during ungodly late night hours. Wanna know more about him? Connect via Social Media by jumping to about.me/sascha.endlicher.
