U.S. Cellular Brings Love to the World

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Oh for fuck’s sake! Are you kidding me?

Yawn. Dudes Fill Levi’s With Helium and Float

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Following the questionably-real video of a guy back flipping into a pair of Levi’s, a new, definitely not real video has a guy with his pants filled with helium float off into the air.

Foot-Focused Moving Company Sponsors Severed Feet

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When it comes to moving and moving companies, big trucks and cardboard boxes are the sort of imagery that usually come to mind.

Lame-Ass Headline Comes From Sixth-Grade Diary

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As only Copyranter can, a new smartwater billboard featuring Jennifr Anniston receives a well-deserved lashing.

Deutsch Doesn’t Know the Difference Between GM and Chrysler

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OK, what? Does Deutsch really not know the difference between a Pontiac Solstice and a Corvette?

Go to Cannes And…Talk About In-Text Advertising? WTF?

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Well if you ever want to watch the world’s longest, most boring dissertation (um, blatherific business babble) on in-text advertising, give this Cannes Fringe video a watch in which Asa Bailey interviews Vibrant Media CMO Sean Finnegan who goes on and on and on and…

Verizon’s Dumb Dad Still Acting Like an Idiot

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Yup, it seems the Verizon Dumb Dad is still alive and well.

Kobe Teams With Jackass Crew For Another Fake Jump

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Uh…right. No one was fooled the first time and no one will be fooled the second time.

Amstel Light: Not Big on the Whole ‘Literacy’ Thing

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Amstel Light may have taught us properly how to spell “beer” in Dutch, but this is definitely not how you spell “damn.”

Yawn. Naked Woman Promotes Magazine

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When I think of heading over to Borders or Barnes and Noble to pick up the latest copy of What Mobile Magazine, the first thing on my mind is always, always, always hot, sexy blondes with a Gwyneth Paltrow-ish come-hither look

Optical Allusions Amuse, Confuse, Promote Non-Existent Site

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This was probably fun to film but, um, huh?

Gladiator Ad Banned Because Contestants Breasts Are Too Large

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Hot women with big breasts always seem to get the bum deal and it makes no sense.

Microsoft Shafts Music Patrons Pre-Zune

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Last week Microsoft announced that, as of August 31, it will no longer issue DRM license keys for songs bought on MSN Music.

RMG Connect Lawyers Will Soon be Calling Newly Named RPM Connect Lawyers

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Looks like we’re in for some more legal wranglings over agency naming.

McCain Girls Not Helping McCain

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Who knew? McCain has his own bevy of Obama Girls.

Apple Sued for Failing to Deliver on ‘Millions of Colors’

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Apple’s getting sued because the marketing material for its new iMac desktop monitor promises people “millions of colours.” In actuality, the 20in version only displays 262,144. Those bastards!

T-Mobile Asks Engadget Mobile to Stop Using Magenta

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In yet another display of corporate legal idiocy, T-Mobile parent Deutsche Telekom sent a letter to Weblogs, Inc.’s Engadget Mobile asking them to stop using the color magenta in their logo.

Russian Mail Order Brides Need No ‘Evolution’

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The mail order bride thing is questionable at best but this new commercial for loveme.com which spoofs Dove’s Evolution and claims Russian woman need no retouching spoofs the original perfectly.

Girl Dispenses Soap From Under Her Skirt

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Now you might think this up-skirt soap dispenser promoting some candid camera-style show on FX is kind of witty but, dude, do you really want to be sticking your hand up there after thousands of guys have done so before you?

Promotional Boat Video Bores Like A Winding Mountain Road Car Ad

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If you’re a fan of monotonously boring winding mountain road car commercials, you’re gonna love this video of a new boat called the XSR48.