U.K. Watchdog Puts a Lid on Rihanna's Sultry Perfume Ad

Britain’s Advertising Standards Authority is once again stepping in to save us all, this time from a saucy ad for Rihanna’s perfume, Rogue.

The ad, which is basically a nude Rihanna sandwiched between a wall and a giant perfume bottle, is too “sexually suggestive” to be seen in areas heavily trafficked by children, the U.K. watchdog group has decided. The specific complaints addressed the ad’s placement on elevator doors in a shopping mall.

The ASA had received complaints saying the ad was demeaning to women and inappropriate to children.

Parlux Ltd. (the company that makes Rogue) is protesting the restriction by arguing that the ad doesn’t feature “improper nudity or offensive, suggestive or demeaning imagery,” and that Rihanna’s posture is powerful rather than demeaning.

The ASA agreed the ad isn’t demeaning, but that’s not to say the image conveys power either. I mean, the poor woman is jammed into a really awkward position and scowling like she just caught the bad end of a slow-moving fart.



Louis CK One Is a Mashup That Smells Like Perfection

What do you get when you combine the soulless, artsy advertising imagery of CK One with the doughy, balding, angst-sweaty magnificence of Louis C.K.? One awesome Tumblr, that's what.

Louis CK One is a mashup that combines images of the comedian, famous for keeping it real, with the plastic, hyperstylized aesthetic of Calvin Klein. Bogus billboards and faux magazine spreads display his pot belly and shiny pate in close proximity to stylish "Louis CK One" bottles, creating an image so oxymoronic it becomes social satire.

Refinery29 guesses at the "Louis CK One" bouquet: "Aniseed and pizza grease? Citrus and flop sweat? Baby powder and righteous rage?" Hey wait, that's what the real CK One smells like!

The joke ads posted so far are great, but I'm hoping for a parody of Calvin Klein's pretentious commercials. Imagine a Louis C.K. impersonator (or the real deal) rocking a black sleeveless number, wagging his Doritos-smeared middle finger at the camera and lamenting, as he did last year to Conan O'Brien, "You never feel completely sad or completely happy; you just feel kinda satisfied with your product, and then you die!"

 


    

New Britney Spears Video, ‘Perfume,’ Sure Seems Like One Big Ad for Her Perfume

"Perfume," the newest single off Britney Spears' latest album, Britney Jean, is ostensibly about a weird love triangle. But what it really seems to be about is selling the singer's fragrance line.

Fantasy—Britney's best-selling perfume—is heavily featured here (it also has a cameo appearance in her song "Work, Bitch"), with Britney playing the "other woman" and singing, "While I wait I put on my perfume / yeah I want it all over you / I gotta mark my territory."

Scenes of Britney spraying herself with Fantasy run throughout the video, inspiring teenagers everywhere to overload the olfactory senses of everyone who passes them in the mall. So was the song written specifically to market her line? I'd guess so, especially since—and I say this as a 1997 BritBrit fan—the lyrics are just awful. Via Mashable.


    

Helvetica Perfume, ‘For Those Who Dare to Be the Same’

What do you get for the designer who has everything? How about nothing?

Helvetica The Perfume is literally just water, or "modernism distilled." Created as a gag gift by creative collective Guts and Glory, each bottle costs $62 plus shipping. If you're interested, you might want to hurry, because all shipments go out by Dec. 5.

As you might expect, most of the copywriting around the pseudo-perfume is pretty entertaining, capturing the best of black-turtle-neck designer speak with an implied wink.

"This typeface was to have no intrinsic meaning, allowing the content to convey the message. … It is in this spirit that we have created the ultimate Modernist perfume–a scent distilled down to only the purest and most essential elements to allow you, the content, to convey your message with the utmost clarity."

The Twitter feed is pretty good, too. We've dropped in a few of our favorite posts below.